Tag Archives: relationship

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SEX AND LOVE MAKING

Standard
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SEX AND LOVE MAKING

Love-making is defined as the copulation of two individuals normally a man and a woman to express their strong emotions towards each other, in such cases the two are willing to endure the pleasures and pain brought by sexual intercourse, Sex on the other hand  is having sexual intercourse just for mare  pleasure. Most people don’t know the difference between sex and love-making and so to help you realize the difference between such, EZM magazine has decided to help you recognize them by listing them down.

·        You can only make love to one person no matter how many people you have sex with,no matter how many times you mess around with different people, there is always that special person that moves you sexually and makes you feel fulfilled sexual wise. This person gives you good thoughts whenever you think of the things you do together and it makes you want to do it over and over again with them, they are more like a sexual appetizer.

 

·        Sex does not necessarily mean you are in love with someone, it can just be to ease yourself, please someone, or serve as a trade where you agree to be friends with benefits.

 

·        Love-making requires the two individuals involved to fully give in with all their emotions without holding back and don’t feel restricted to trying out what they want. If you make love to someone, you won’t feel embarrassed of what your partner would feel because you can trust them with your body. Love-making requires special timing and a comfortable place like a bedroom in order to cater both individual needs.

 

·        Sex can be done anywhere regardless of place or time, it can be in cars, bushes,toilets and so on, it is also mostly done within a short phrase of time.

 

·        Love–making takes great interest in knowing whether your partner is enjoying or comfortable and it is mostly done with special care not to hate the other, sex on the other hand  does not take time to study what the other person is feeling or to analyze the mood of the person.It is mostly done to satisfy the initiator and mostly selfish in that it is sometimes one sided.

 

·        Love-making ignites special and sweet memories of the person even when you are not together, you will have a strong attraction to the other person because they mean so much to you and this teaches you to appreciate and value your partner.

 

·        Sex does have to bring about good memories and you can do it with anyone at any place. It can just be done because you are bored, stressed, form of exercise or just to learn more about your sexuality and how far you can go sexual wise.

 

·        Most sexual relationships end up miserable for the people involved unless if it was just a contract or form of trade. Otherwise most people who have sexual encounters in the name of a fling end up in tragic situations in that one of the two falls in love with the other or starts to feel more than just a fling and hence jealousy and insecurity starts to creep up. Love making draws people close and connects them emotionally as some kind of attachment.

So-which one are you having, pleasure or commitment?

By: Memory “Candyluv” Sankalimba

memorysankalimba@ezmmagazine.com

 

WHAT MEN CRAVE FROM THEIR PARTNERS!

Standard
WHAT MEN CRAVE FROM THEIR PARTNERS!

WHAT MEN CRAVE FROM THEIR PARTNERS!

You’d be surprised to know that it’s not just mind blowing sex that men crave. Men also love.

* Surprise!  A new pair of sneakers, boxers or T-shirt. Dinner at his favourite restaurant or a copy of his favourite DVD will remind him that your relationship can still be full of unpredictable fun.

 

 

* Your Touch: While he’s unblocking the drain, give him a peck on the back of his neck and watch the goose bumps appear. Trust me you’ll be on his mind for the rest of the day.

 

 

* TIME TO SPACE OUT. Vegging-out time rates surprisingly high on guys’ lists of needs. After work, give him time to recharge-  and enjoy your own “me time”, too.

 

 

There you have it ladies, blow your man’s mind by trying out the above tips and be ready to say goodbye to a boring and predictable relationship and HELLO to a fun and happier relationship.

 

By: Memory Kalima

 

 

 

 

 

How I Moved On After Having My Heartbroken TWICE

Standard
How I Moved On After Having My Heartbroken TWICE

This is my story. I am a 20 something year old woman and even though my years spent on earth are not much, but I have learned and realized that life is what you make it and the people you choose to have in it. This is my story of the biggest heartbreak of my life. How I survived, hurt, cried and rejoiced. I am telling you this hoping that you will not meet the same fate as I, and if you have, you can also come through with your story and enlighten many others. I know that I am not the only woman who has gone through this but they are million more going through the same fate because of what they are blind to see and realize.

 

The first time that I saw him, I knew that it was meant to be and that he would play a significant role in my life. Two years after I first laid my eyes on him, we started talking through a friend and we got to know each other better and it was love at first sight. We connected deeper and it felt like he was the missing puzzle of me. I did not just learn how to love this man, but I also loved him unconditionally. After dating for a few months, we moved in together and I do not know how we survived as there had been moments where we wanted to kill each other, where we loved each other, argued but nonetheless we kept it moving.

I am a very independent woman, I grew up in a matriarchic family and I have been independent since the age of 16 so taking care of myself and my lifestyle is something which falls natural. When I had met this then love of my life, he was not doing too well, his career was shaky and he did not even have a place to stay. I worked hard for us to get the house, and I did not just support him financially but emotionally as well. I was there when his job didn’t go too well, I supported when he needed encouragement, everything that a woman can possible be and do for the man she loves, but unfortunately I had trapped myself into a cage of being walked over.

The problems began six to seven months into the relationship. I realized that he is not just soulless and heartless man but also a gold-digging man. His true colors started to show and I started to put one and two together, that is when I had come to realize that this man is just as evil and the devil he. He started seeing other girls, some which had the nerves to even come and greet me at our house and after a while I had to leave the country to go and finish my university and the minute I had left, he stopped being in touch, whenever I’d call he would never pick up and I felt so used and abused. This became the turning point of my life. I was told by my grandmother to never ever force a man to love you if he doesn’t and I just let him go. This was the darkest moment of my love life. I contemplated suicide because I could not grasp how a man could be so evil and heartless after one had sacrificed and worked so hard to help them grow and become established. The tears on my pillows, the heart I felt every moment I woke up, I thought that it was the end of me but I prayed and it helped me move on.

I got my shit together and I decided to go university. I had first applied to a university that was close to him so that we could be closer but that was not God’s plan, I got accepted to one of the world’s best universities in my field and it was far from him. I packed up my things and said; Lord I’ll do this as though my life depended on it. I went to university with heartbreak but it had started to heal and I became happier. His family and I were pretty much close, especially his sister, I could cry for her but also my friends when I needed a shoulder and it helped me move on.

The first semester had finished and I was doing so much better and happier. To my surprise one day, I woke up and found an email from him trying to get me into talking. I was very pissed off and ashamed that he took me that easily but I still loved him a lot so I gave in easily and we started talking and working over some problems. I felt not comfortable being with him yet so I decided not go home for the term break but to go and visit family elsewhere. I forgave him because I thought that he had changed and he showed me that he had changed. We started planning our lives and future together, it felt like he finally got it and was ready to move on and settle down. I could not have loved him, we’re celebrating our 2nd year anniversary as a couple together and a few months after, I even flew home to spend my vacation with him and it was just amazing; I started letting my guard down again which I now regret.

A few months later, I had started working as part of my education and he asked me for assistance as he wanted to leave the smaller house we found together into a bigger house accordingly to him, he wanted to grow now and be able to have a bigger house as the next stage into our relationship. I thought really hard, God knows that I did. Problems had started to pop up in our relationship again, now it was the women from his past. I started putting things together and analyzed the situation and realized that I had been used to but we worked through it and said let’s keep on moving. I had not forgotten all the evil things he had done to me or how he took advantage of my financial status and he wanted my help again, I prayed about it and I recall telling him now that you’ll move into a bigger house that was closer to town, you’ll be having girlfriends over forget about me and he denied, insisted that it was just to have a bigger space.

The month of our 3rd year anniversary, my thoughts were right. I got a TEXT from him saying that “He did not love me anymore and that he loved someone else and there was nothing I could do about it” He had moved on. For the 2nd time he had left me hanging, hurt, heartbroken and distraught but this time I was too busy with life to give a flying fuck. I was hurt and cried but I realized that you can’t keep a good woman down and moved on with my life. I did not even try to fix anything or win him over; I just kept quiet and moved on.

A year later, I am happier, I have a job, got my degree and dating again. It was not easy and I did not want it to be easy. I never rebounded or lied to myself. I cried, I felt anger, disappointment and wished him bad things and everything that an emotional, disappointed, used woman felt. He left me for a girl who did not have much going for her and here I helped him establish himself, look good and paid for the house he was sleeping with her in. All of these thoughts came and left, but I never insulted him, talked bad about him or showed that I was hurt. I kept it moving and decided to never ever be the man in the relationship.  He is now still dating but I know that God works in mysterious ways and I would have never ever wanted to be in the position that his girlfriend is in right now because I deserve and will get better.

I realized to never be the man in the relationship. He a man asks you for help, unless the police come with a warrant, that is when you can think of helping him and borrow that money from your relatives or friends that he fears so that he knows he has to pay it back. Be the woman in the relationship! I’m not saying be submissive but when be the woman when you’re with him and a warrior when you’re at work. He is a man and he is taught to hustle for himself and you. You worry about yourself and handle you and make him feel like he is the man and taking care of you but deep inside you know that you have your own thing and you don’t depend on him. Take time to know a man, don’t jump into relationships just because you’re lonely or your friends are laughing at you. You’d surprised that 80% of them have cheating partners and they are just keeping up appearances to live up to the expectations of society. Take your time to LOVE, COMPLETE and TRUST YOU! Establish a career, a life and set goals on how you want your life to be, the people in them and the man. Don’t be scared to date or talk to men whilst you’re doing this just as long as you don’t spread your legs and learn from it you will be fine. Being an independent woman doesn’t mean you have to be buying, supporting and catering from men, NO! It means that you can take care of yourself. Be wise when choosing a man, some of them will want to use and abuse you. Be patient and be happy! Confidence attracts confidence!  It is important to have the right friends and people around you.

Hope this will help you fight your battle but also help you prevent being in one.

 

9 stages a Facebook relationship goes through.

Standard
9 stages a Facebook relationship goes through.

Facebook has been the biggest social network we have seen since the day of the Internet. Facebook is no longer  a place to chat and communicate with your friends and family, but now you can advertise, work, and FIND LOVE on Facebook. This has been a platform for many marriages, but also failed relationships. EZM Magazine has listed 9 stages that a Facebook relationship goes through and the stages you should watch out for or to know if you are in one and we will also publish “9 ways to save your relationship on Facebook shortly after.

 

  THE FIRST COMMENT

This is the stage where a simple hi in your inbox, wall or picture comment gets you in trigged after getting bored watching all your friends pictures, wall posts and comments and you do not have much left to do. You notice the hi, or comment someone posted on your picture or your friends picture or post, reply and then it turns into a conversation with questions like”what you are doing and what is for the day or night” A lot of “LOL” LMFAO” and other expressions we use because are we too lazy to actually laugh out loud are the beginning. Later on you decide to take everything to the inbox so that you can have a bit of privacy after writing too many comments on walls, pictures and etc.

 INBOX

After having decided to avoid attention from your friends and profile visitors, you now start getting to know each other in the inbox message. This is the stage you start asking about backgrounds, occupation, and education, family to see if the chemistry can be worked on and this usually grows into a deep more personal connection and you start getting to know each other more.

CHATTING

Here you actually get to have instant messages and questions sent to your boo and you get a closer bound and you feel the tingling feel in your stomach, this is also yet another step into bounding

TEXTING

Your chemistry has grown and now since you are not on the internet 24/7 but your phone is and you miss your Facebook boo too much and feel that you have passed all the first stages of just talking on Facebook, now you are seeking the opportunity of making it something real and maybe you can become a couple.

 PHONE CALLING

Now you are no longer just only a Facebook flirt, it has become a bit deeper than that. Here you want to hear the voice of your Facebook boo, to ask them how their day went and tell them how much you miss them and all the sweet things lover says and honestly no one would waste their money and time to call anyone whom they are not interested in. This is a good sign.

WALL POSTS

This is the stage where the two of you are together but have not officially announced it to the world and friends yet but you want to scare off all the boys or girls on their friend list by writing sweet writings on their walls to see if they have been lying for being single

RELATIONSHIP STATUS

Now after writing on the walls, everyday in boxing, texting, calling and chatting, you have now become a couple and this is the stage where you change your relationship status to let the world know whom you are dating.

PICTURES

You want to show off your sexy boo and also show your Facebook boo that amongst all of their friends, you have profiled pictured them and everyone who visits their page will know that they are dating you. YOU BECOME SPECIAL AND OFFICIAL. This is a sign of insurance and relief to know that your Facebook boo is willing to let the whole world know that you two are dating and also have your picture.

HAPPY/ENDING

This is the stage where you start planning when and where and if you will ever meet in person. This stage is crucial as where more than 50% of all Facebook relationships fail because you have just realized that you are a person of need, and you need sexual intercourse, you need psychical touch and also you need someone to hug, kiss and hang out with in person and after realizing this, reality slowly starts to sink in and you start drifting apart OR you can decide to stick it through, let true lover conquer all, meet in person, fall even deeper in love and live happily ever after

 

Read next week we will give you 9 ways to save your relationship on Facebook

 

Inspiration for struggling marriages and relationships

Standard
Inspiration for struggling marriages and relationships

 

 When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said,
I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed
the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth But I had to let her know what I
was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry She threw away the chopsticks and
shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She
was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage.
But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to
Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she
could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten
years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted
time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved
Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had
expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of
divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer
now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the
table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast
because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so
I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything
from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in
that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her
reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want
to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how
I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our
bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to
make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought
it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce,
she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both
appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms.
His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then
to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes
and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling
somewhat upset. I put her down outside

the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I
could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this
woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There
were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its
toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning.
This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing
again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month
slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but
could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown
bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why
I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.
Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him,
seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his
life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I
turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last
minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the
sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally.
I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my
arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly
and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I
was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane
opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce
anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever?
She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My
marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of
our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that
since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her
until death do us apart.

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the
door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife The
salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you
out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up
stairs, only to find my wife in the bed – dead.

My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even
notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the
whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the
divorce.– At least, in the eyes of our son— I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So
find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other
that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

 

 

 

 

 

This is an email that EZM Magazine recieved in one of our emails and we do not own the right to this story and the source of originatlity remains unknown.